Family Life Education Series
Bedwetting - A cry for understanding

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(This article is supplied by the Welfare Services Group)

We have so far run four articles in OffBeat : two on parenting and two on marital relationship. In the coming five articles, we will focus on issues related to the growth of our children - the problems they face and the parents' attitude which can help them cope with these problems.

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Bedwetting - A cry for understanding!

Professor Wong Chung-kwong

Chairman, Positive Living United Services

(The full text of Professor Wong's article will be uploaded on the Healthy Lifestyle web site on POINT)

Bedwetting is common and often 'normal'! Ten per cent and five per cent of the normal children at the age of five years and 10 years respectively are still wetting their beds at night.

The first question to ask is whether the child has ever been dry before. If he has never, the situation is known as 'Primary Bedwetting'. The most common reason is a slower (but normal) acquisition of bladder control (just like the normal age range of babies learning to walk is from 10 to 18 months).

If the child is developing normally in other aspects, there is no reason for worries. We just let the child mature at his/her own speed. With very few exceptions, these children will acquire bladder control (the only exception is that a very small number of adults do continue to wet their beds).

It is important not to take a normal variation in development as a problem. Regrettably many parents do so because they misunderstand their children. They often try to accelerate the child's development by using wrong and futile strategies such as humiliation and punishment. These parents often say to their children: "You are so lazy, naughty and useless. You rather wet your bed than to get up!" These remarks cannot even pass the test of common sense if we care to think more deeply: "Which is more troublesome for the child?" To get up, go to the toilet and get back to the warm and dry bed will take no more than one or two minutes but to get wet, get up, get scolded, get changed and then get back to the cold bed will probably take at least 10 to 15 minutes.

If the child has been dry before and is getting wet again, the situation is referred to as 'Secondary Bedwetting'. This condition is likely to be pathological and the reason is usually either biological such as urinary tract infection or psychiatric particularly emotional disturbance. The treatment? We must take bedwetting as a symptom and treatment must be directed to the underlying infection or psychiatric disturbance.

If you have any problems with toilet training of your children, please feel free to call your respective regional welfare office: Hong Kong Island (2804-1570), Marine (2301-1670), Kowloon East (2304-1400), Kowloon West (2150-7988), New Territories North (2673-5983) and New Territories South (2418-0050).